As I was walking through the Changdeokgung Palace in Seoul, South Korea, I overheard a very interesting conversation.
A Chinese tourist and a Dutch tourist were walking in front of me talking (in English). The Chinese tourist was explaining the different types of tourists he sees from around the world:
“Koreans, they are often silent. They may not say much the whole conversation, unless they have something very important to say. For example, they may say one thing in the conversation: something you should do. They’ll phrase it like a suggestion, ‘You might want to consider doing this.’ Absolutely do it. Don’t let that confuse you. It’s a complete necessity. That’s why they are bringing it up.
“Americans, on the other hand, never shut up. They will constantly ask you questions, like they are interrogating you. It’s their way to connect with you as a person and get to know you. They’re trying to be friendly, but it can take some time to get used to. They love long conversations where they ask you tons of questions about their life.”
When I heard this, I was trying not to laugh out loud because as an American it is so true for me: I love asking lots of questions as a way to get to know someone.
At the end of the day, this is only one person’s take on American vs Korean styles of interactions, but as an American, I found it helpful to hear the perspectives of US culture from others around the world. They shed new light on my styles of communicating that I often take for granted. We can become so used to our way of doing things that we can easily forget to see it for what it is: one way among many.
Thus, when you talk with others around the world, feel free to think about how they might see you, and if you are feeling particularly adventurous, you can even ask how you come across. It makes a fantastic edition to add to your long list of questions.
(If you find discussions of people’s experiences in other cultures around the world like this interesting, please let me know, and I will be sure to keep writing these.)